Before Alex and I got married, we spent a fair chunk of time in a long distance relationship. We had no other choice but to master the art of dirty texting. Or ‘sexting’ as the cool people call it. (I really don’t know if that’s true. I’ve never been cool… but I’m going with it anyway.) We did it all day, every day… until the time I hit ‘send’ on a text and it went to the wrong person. My brother.
“I’ve been really bad. I wish you were here to bend me over and spank me” (It was something close to that. Thankfully, this happened six years ago.)
I’m pretty sure if there was a God, he would have followed my wishes and struck me down right then and there. Because, holy shit… I was begging him to. Anybody but my brother. Why him? Why, God, WHY? It’s one of the more horrifying moments in memory for me.
His response, which came a slow and agonizing hour later: “Yeah, uh… I’m going to pass on that…” It took quite awhile for my embarrassment over the situation to fade.
Have you ever sent a text to the wrong person before? Were you as embarrassed as me? Or were you too busy laughing your ass off to be worried about it?
For some reason this made me die of laughter.
The Shameful Sheep 
HAHAHA! I can’t imagine what your brother thought getting that…
Oh jeez… I’m sure he was disturbed! Hahaha
Great post and what a great bunch of replies! I texted my ex instead of my mom, about him. Oops! He wrote back that he agreed we were happier apart than together… Whew! Not fun.
And I haven’t laughed this much in a while, thank you! Tears were shed.
At least he agreed and you had already broken up. That could have been disastrous! lol 🙂
True!
I knew there was a reason I don’t text! You just gave it to me. Thanks!!
I aim to please 🙂
This has never happened to me, but I am constantly checking to make sure I am sending to the right person, because I am paranoid. However, if I did send something like that to my brother, I would be able to quickly tell him, and we would both get a good laugh over it. He would be one of the best people to send it to for that reason. 🙂
Haha nice! I think we would have a similar reaction now, too. When I was younger I was a lot more shy and awkward. Now, it’s whatever 🙂 It’s bound to happen to you some day! Muhaha.
Just as long as none of my messages to Gary goes to my kids or my dad. My mom would probably laugh. So would my dad, but still… Awkward! Actually my kids would be fine too, as they are older now. I would never hear the end of it though.
I am totally with you on this one. If I send a sketchy/controversial text, I’ll immediately check back to make sure it was sent to the right recipient. The paranoia is real!
not a text but an email. Secretary in group I was in sent an email one day to our entire group (about 25 or us) saying “Hot dog lunch for you all on Friday!” she was supposed to just send to the supervisors. Email was brand new then at work, think it was ’88.
Did they follow through and get everybody hotdogs?! Haha.
Back in April, my fiancé lost his job…accidentally started sending rage-filled texts to my mom in the middle of the night about murdering his boss…whoops…
Oh God… That’s not creepy or anything lol! Was your mom sketched? Jeez.
lol, she knew about the situation and texted me a mom-type message in the morning about loving us and hoping that the situation worked out for the best (but that I shouldn’t murder people)
OMFG!
Hahaha! I once sent my stepmom a text laughing about something stupid my dad did. It was intended for a friend and wasn’t very kind. Fortunately I was able to play it off.
Now I think I’ll “accidentally” send my brother a sext just to see his response. Maybe get my husband to as well. My bro is very laid back, would be interesting to see how he reacts.
Oh jeez. If you do I hope you let me know how it goes haha
Haha oh god. I’m glad you could pull it off 🙂
I audibly gasped when I read sent it to my brother. Holy shit. When interviewing babysitters we were down to 3 until 1 of the girls sent us a topless pic on accident, Lord I pray it was on accident. And this chick was found on care.com. We had to pay to get this hayseed as one of the 3 contenders. That made our decision a third easier.
Lmao oh god. How embarrassing. What did she say? I would have called care.com and demanded a refund hahaha. Woulda been funny
She said nothing. If I were in he place, I probably wouldn’t have either. Wouldn’t that have been funny if she called a week later asking if she had the job?
Hahaha. I would have paid to see her reaction when she realized what she did. Hilarious
My brother would vomit if I accidentally sent him a message like that! He gets so uncomfortable when we talk about sex in front of him! Especially when my parents do it!!!
Vomit? Haha damn. That’s crazy.
For real. He gags, and says to his wife, “OK, we have to go now”, if we start joking about sex stuff! Very entertaining 😉
Haha he’d be fun to mess with 🙂
He sure is! And we do! My dad will often say to my mom, “Come on hun, let’s go bang it!” – Oh how we laugh! 😉
Oh wow. That is truly terrifying. Luckily, my dirty texts have always been on target. Some innocent ones were sent to the wrong person because I don’t triple check them, but then it is only a second of confusion instead of a bit of embarrassment!
Whew. I hope it stays that way and you don’t slip up on accident lol 🙂
Hilarious!
Oh wow, thank you for the laugh – and the timing! I had an appointment with my (young, male) physio the other day, then sent him a text ‘Want pizza tonight?’ Luckily the physio was understanding, even more lucky I wasn’t asking hubby for anything else! I was embarrassed enough with that, my scalp actually prickled when reading yours. Glad you’ve recovered – finally! 😉
Haha what a coincidence! I hope you ended up getting your pizza anyway somehow 🙂
Yes, and I ate it with my husband, not my physio, like a good girl, lol!
I can honestly say I’ve never sent a text message to the wrong person before. I have also never sent a text message to the right person before. Or any person before….
No texting at all? Blasphemous!
Never. And my phone is will celebrate its 10th birthday later this year! I never got into the smartphone craze at all…
It’s probably better off that way, really. I don’t text nearly as much as I used to lol. I don’t really need one anymore
Yes, my father, god rest his soul. Only, it was accompanied by a photograph. You never cease to make me laugh.
A photo ! Scary lol. I’m glad I make you laugh. Woo 🙂
Yes, a photo and please don’t ask me to explain what was happening in the photo. Probably better viewed upside down though.
Hahaha. Okay… I’ll just let my imagination come up with something crazy 🙂
Shit! The way my life is going now and with the number off guys I’m chatting too, I need to double check if I’m sending the right message to the right person…But it happened once, I sent a pic to my sister’s pastor, thank G he didn’t have my number on his phone and it was a headless pic of me…Sjoe, imagine that HAHAHA
To a pastor? Jesus hahah. That would have been hilarious if he knew who it was or your face was in the photo. Whoops!
imagine that!
LOL. I hardly ever text. If I sexted my husband, he’d probably be worried it was meant for someone else, LOL!
Haha that would be funny 🙂 Hey, April Fools is coming up you know.
And Valentine’s Day! : 0
Ha! I didn’t even think of that. Jeez
Old enough to have sent and received steamy letters on our long distance love … sometimes wondered if they’d steamed themselves open, unless it was the postman …
Ooo, I wonder how much the postman enjoyed them. Haha. Lucky him!
Hysterical. Not that I often drop the F bomb, but I hate that it auto corrects to “duck.” I changed the settings. So that if that if “duck” came up it would correct back to “fuck.” A couple of months ago I sent a text to my 31 year old male co-teacher (I’m 62), that I knew he was trying to duck me. You can imagine what it autocorrected to. Luckily, he has a good sense of humor….
Hahahahah that’s amazing. The one time you wanted to type duck. Of course! Hilarious
That was sooo funny!
OMG this made me HOWL! 😀 Thank you!
I’m glad! 😀
oh my….that would be a strike me down moment. The worst I have done is when our daughter moved into a new apartment and I went to visit, I texted my husband that I wasn’t too sure about the place. If I had an opinion, I wouldn’t let her live there. Yup, the text went to my daughter. She was sitting right next to me.
Oh jeez, I can only imagine the look on her face haha
Oh, god, that is horrifying yet hilarious! I can’t remember a funny text that I mistakenly sent but I remember vividly the time where I was the person someone mistakenly sent a text to! It was during a business trip with a coworker I had JUST met that day. We exchanged digits so we could grab dinner that night at the hotel and at like 11pm, he texted me “night night wife wife.” I didn’t respond b/c I was too freaked out, lol. He texted me back “omg, ignore that please. I meant that for my wife.” (obviously!). I now use that phrase on my husband as a joke ‘cuz c’mon, it’s a cute phrase!
Aw that’s actually pretty sweet haha. I could see it being a little embarrassing! But I agree- it’s a cute phrase lol!
What’s your cell phone number? Heh heh, heh heh
(Next comes “what are wearing” as the realm of creepy grows)
Oh, uh… I don’t have one anymore 🙂
BAWWWWWWWKKKKKK!!!!!!
“We did it all day, every day… until the time I hit ‘send’ on a text and it went to the wrong person. My brother.”
My jaw dropped.
I gasped.
Hands to face.
Haha. It was pretty traumatic!
LOL! I laughed so hard I read your post to my wife.
😀
This is so amazing 😂😂😂 I was long distance as well and thank goodness this never happened to me. Although that is pretty damn hilarious!!
Haha you’re lucky! Be careful 🙂
Laughing out loud because I use to date a girl who thought I loved her when at the end of my txt I put lol and she read it lots of love…. Anyway no wrong txt to the wrong people yet touch wood. 🙂
Haha oh boy. Lol is a sign of love. That must have been so confusing!
It was 🙂
Ignore that last text. I was sending a message to my podiatrist.
(Yes, I am bored and trying to entertain myself)
You’re pretty crazy !
This whole post is funny but as I scrolled down and saw that text you put a pic of with the cat I cackled- yes and like you I have no idea why but it made me laugh! 😂 Thank you!
Right? The picture really didn’t have much to do with my post, but I thought it was hilarious! Haha
It was a funny bonus to a funny post 😄😎
Thanks hun, I really needed the laugh! I never sent a text to the wrong person, but I’ve accidentally put “love” instead of “sincerely” on business emails!
This is why I never commit any of my naughtier thoughts to a permanent media!
Yes, I’ve sent texts to the “wrong” person. But I am careful not to text/tweet/pm anything that would be really embarrassing because it has the possibility of ALWAYS ending up in the “wrong” hands no matter what so . . . .not doing it is easier. But I was still embarrassed because I sent something to a student that I would not have had I been paying attention to who I was texting. I just took a picture and sent it to the last person that texted me. I thought it was my husband, but it was not. It was just a picture of my side view mirror that had just been taken off by a passed out driver. But when I called him and he didn’t know what I was talking about I was annoyed. Turned out it was because I didn’t send the pic to him.
Your brother had a GREAT response! Ha, ha, ha!
Wow, I’m glad it was just a picture of your car. That could have gone very badly. Whew.
I’ve received several wrong emails and texts I often respond. Consider it a creative writing prompt. I had one dude convinced I was his buddy and blew him off last night because I ended up in prison after I tried to pick up a hooker THAT WAS A BRO, DUDE.
And then there was the email from the rental agency who got a little biffed when I asked about clarification in the lease that I’d have 48 hours notice before maintenance stopped in, due to my free-range boa constrictor….
Hahahah. That sounds fun. I wish that would happen to me so I could have fun like that. Hilarious. I wonder what the people in the rental office thought of the free-range boa hahaha
They were…unimpressed. HAHAHA
Except I usually write better than that first sentence up there. (Blame the boa. He’s unusually snuggly today)
I just stole that picture of the “cat” and sent it to all my friends! I can’t stop laughing 😂😂
It’s great, right? Haha. I wish that happened to me.
Haha poor dog! And also, MAN, that must have been mortifying. I sent a text about fancying someone to the girl I fancied at school by accident but nothing that bad. Did your brother ever bring it up again?