if Cousin Itt had a vagina

Things you don’t want to overhear when you’re waiting in line at the grocery store after church:

Random woman: I’m so glad I’m finally buying a new┬árazor, it’s really bad down there. If Cousin Itt had a vagina…

Random man: Don’t say that in public!

Random woman: They can’t hear me… I said it quietly…

Me: Do you need to go ahead of us? It seems like you have something important to tend to…

Man: …………………………….

Woman: …………………………..

Alex: …………………………

Of course, Alex scolded me in the car for not minding my own business. I think he was slightly embarrassed. Could I have ignored it and not said anything? Yes. Would that have been as fun? No way.